What Ever Happened to "Girls First?"

After reading The Luxe series, which takes place in 1899 Manhattan, New York, I've been thinking about something. What has happened to etiquette, manners, and common courtesy towards women? It seems like "girls first" is a way of the past. When comparing, say Ryan's grandparents, who are a great example of "the old way" and being very courteous towards eachother, to people my age or younger, I think things have dwindled a little bit. I like to observe the children in primary (since I have plenty of time to do that just sitting there behind the piano) and see the lack of respect and common courtesy some of them show. I'm sure kids weren't that way back when manners were so important and such a way of life. I know society is a lot different now, but still, that's no excuse for bad manners and lack of courtesy.

So I have set it a priority that I step things up a notch from what I've been doing and really teach my children more of the proper way to do things. We're lacking a little bit, like when we sit down to eat at the dinner table. I'm even bad at this one where I'm tired by that time so I put my elbows on the table and slouch--bad bad bad!! I also have horrible posture and unfortunately a couple of my kids have inherited that so we're working on posture as well. We're also working on chewing our food with our mouths CLOSED and waiting until the food is swallowed before blabbing something out. We're working on the proper way to ask for someone to pass something to them (in a complete sentence, not "salt please!"), the proper way to eat a roll/bread, to eat soup, to wipe your mouth, and how you DO NOT reach over someone. I know these are all basic things but I really want my kids to know what's up. Manners matter very much!! One thing I think my kids do well is saying please and thank you. I think we finally got that one down which makes me happy as a mother. One movie that we have watched over and over and that shows some of these things I've mentioned is Princess Diaries Part I . Princess Mia is showed how to sit properly, walk properly, and table manners. It's great.

Another thing I've been trying to stress to my sons is that girls should be treated kindly and softly and they should always be first. As I've observed Christian getting on the kindergarten bus, I've noticed some days he'll get right on in front of the girls. I know he's only in kindergarten, but I've been telling him that he should let the little girls get on the bus first and then he can get on. He needs to know this now. It's common courtesy, is it not? I think Pierce has gotten the gist of this. He's very good at opening the back door for me when we're coming or going and for holding open the door for us when we get to church, and not only for us but for others as well. I always make it a point to really tell him thank you and to let him know how much I appreciate it. He's also very good at helping me carry things or helping when he can see I'm in need of it. He's very sensitive that way and I'm so glad. That's how it should be. So when I serve up dinner I have started serving the girls first and I haven't said anything to the boys. I'm waiting to see if they notice.

I don't think any of these things are out-dated just because society has changed from what it used to be. I also don't think that girls are better than boys or anything like that, I just think that this is the way it should be. We women are special, right? Boys especially need to know the proper way to treat a girl and to have the utmost respect for them. Girls obviously need to have that same respect for boys and act in a ladylike manner. I think that learning proper manners makes you a more well-rounded person and will help in all aspects of life, and I only want the best for my children. If we don't teach them, who will? I'll get off my soapbox now. Just a little something I've been thinking about and feel strongly about.